Mr. Canseco Goes To Washington?

Congress wants to look into the steroids matter in baseball. Among the leaders of the pack is Henry Waxman, Democrat from California and one of the sponsors of the Hatch-Waxman Act, which, years ago, gave rise to the generic drugs industry as we know it. Perhaps Congressman Waxman is looking for a way to turn the steroids crisis into an opportunity. What's next, getting BALCO licensed by the Food and Drug Administration? Generic steroids available over the counter?

As you know, the United States Congress has plenty of free time on its hands. They've solved the Social Security mess, eliminated the deficit, enacted tort and class action reform, helped cure AIDS and foster an environment of peace in the Middle East. Not to mention filling all vacant federal judgeships and enabling public school districts to increase test scores of school children everywhere.

So now they have some spare time and can have a little fun.

Enter Mr. Canseco. He isn't exactly Mr. Smith, and, no, there's no modern-day Jimmy Stewart to play him if Wes Craven were to cast a movie about long-haired freaky people playing the national pastime. He already appeared on "60 Minutes" with Mike Wallace, and it's doubtful that he could say anything more.

I do not believe that Congress should step in here, but the ramifications of Congressional hearings are fascinating. They're fascinating because those called to testify would have to give sworn testimony and would be committing crimes if they were to lie under oath. So, will Jose Canseco give the same testimony under oath that he did to Mike Wallace? What about Mark McGwire, Sammy Sosa, Barry Bonds and the compliment of Texas Rangers' alums whose HR numbers went up significantly after Canseco joined that team? What will they do?

Will they tell the truth or will they take the Fifth Amendment? And, if they did the latter, would they be giving even more credence to what Jose Canseco said?

The possibilities are frightening across the board.

And the TV ratings would be very high.

Baseball reality television, coming to a Congressional hearing room near you very soon.